“I was a university student in the capital, Bishkek, finishing my second year of studies. One day a young man who was studying photography at the same university came into my work place and asked if he could take photos of all the women working in our office to fulfill a requirement for a photography project. We were all flattered so we agreed.

I was living in a flat with a roommate while attending the university. One evening she asked me if I would like to join her for dinner at her parent’s home. When we arrived at their home I was surprised that not only were her parents present for dinner but also her two sister-in laws, grandmother and aunts.

During dinner all the women began to ask me a lot of questions. Then my friend’s aunt began telling me about her son. She told me he was a wonderful young man. She went on to explain to me that he had been involved in an automobile accident some months prior and the accident had left him somewhat disabled. She then began to talk to me about marriage and her expectations for a prospective wife for her son.

Suddenly, I started to feel confused and afraid! I wanted to leave but my flat mate did not seem willing to go. I began to cry and told her aunt not to talk to me about these things. My friend’s mother left the room and when she returned she was carrying a large Kyrgyz scarf in her hands. She handed it to her sister who tied it tightly around my shoulders, which in the Kyrgyz culture is an action used to seal a marriage contract. Then she told me if I refused to marry her son I would bring shame on my family. I knew she was right.

After many hours of arguing and crying I broke under the pressure and agreed to marry her son. I had only seen him once in my life, the day he took my photograph. I had not known he was the cousin of my flat mate. That night he took me as his wife.

The next day I was told to write a letter to my family to advise them that I was now married and would not be returning home. My husband’s family agreed to pay a bride price, which made my family happy.

I was depressed for over a year until my first son was born. All my hopes and dreams for my life were taken from me. Yet I was thankful that my husband did not beat me. He was a kind man.”

One third of all Kyrgyz women are victims of bride kidnapping. A woman shared the above story with us in our recent Bridges for Women training that we held in an old sanatorium in the former Soviet Republic of Kyrgyzstan.

She was excited to learn that the Bible even has stories that address such cultural issues as bride kidnapping. Judges chapter twenty- one gives us a perfect example in the story, “The Wives for the Benjamites.” Also in the book of Esther, chapter two, we read that Esther as well as all the other beautiful virgins in the land were taken and placed into the harem of King Xerxes.

Esther’s story encouraged the women who had experienced the devastation, humiliation and pain of bride kidnapping. It helped them to see that God could even use this unjust event to which they were victim for His Kingdom purpose in their lives, just as he had in Esther’s life.

Her husband is now a believer and pastor of a house church in this predominantly Islamic country. She has forgiven her husband and is grateful to God for His amazing transformation in their lives.